Zack hasn't taken any pictures of his bum lately, but he's still a keeping us on the edge of our seats. I need to follow him around with a clip board to record everything hilarious that comes out of his mouth. Although writing it down never does it justice. His high screechy voice, the lisp that collects spit on the sides of his mouth and the eyebrow-raising are what makes everything he says ever so funny.
This morning he walks out of his room with his batman blanket draped around him like a toga. I couldn't see his feet, but I knew they were bouncing. His eyebrows raised and he said, "Mom! I had the awesomest dream!" When I asked him what it was about he said, "
Yoda had a baby!" That might not be funny to the rest of you, but hours later, I am still laughing over it. I never know what to expect when he opens his mouth.
Just because he's entertaining doesn't mean he's my favorite kid. It's been two years since I tried to sell him and I think about re-posting
the ad on a weekly basis. He's the laziest child I own. Every time he's asked to do the simplest of tasks, he flops on the floor and says he's too tired or his tummy hurts. I have tried every discipline rule in the book. He loves time-out. He'll go to his room any day of the week... and he knows that when mom is firm, his older brothers will give into whatever he says. Ben and Luke were so easy for me, but now all three of them are getting into trouble because Zack is manipulating them into following
HIS agenda. I often wonder if it's rude to send one child to school and keep the older ones home. Unfortunately, Kindergarten isn't full-day and Zack isn't even old enough to attend anyway. What am I going to do with him??
Dr Phil says if you want to know how to discipline a child, find out what his currency is. For Zack, it's art supplies. My biggest battle with him is the MESS he makes with the arts and crafts. It may not sound like much of a problem, but it is. He is literally obsessed with painting. He sleeps with a paintbrush and wakes up wanting to mix colors together. I have no issues with this and I think it's a great outlet for him. But he has no boundaries when it comes to where and when he can paint/draw/tape/cut/create. He goes through about 100 pages of paper everyday. He uses staplers and push pins to hang them all over the house. And Elmer's glue has become his best friend-- some of his masterpieces are literally glued to my walls, but not in places where I can take them down before they dry. Oh no, he glues them behind curtains and down hallways without frequent traffic. If they are taken down before he approves, we have huge tantrums... thrown by both mother and child. And you would never believe where that kid can put masking tape. If it's not wrapped around his body parts (yes, even there) then it's stuck to lamp posts, chair legs, the banister going up the stairs, etc. A few days ago, I was backing up my van after a lunch date with Aaron and thought someone had shattered my back window. Come to find out, Zack created a spiderweb on it with masking tape. I was relieved it wasn't broken, but I don't understand why he came out to the car with tape and scissors and why he needs to "create" while we drive. I know there could be worse problems, but I get really annoyed with him. This is one of his recent drawings. I don't know the story behind it, but if it's of him and his brothers, I can guarantee Zack is the three-headed pogo stick.
This afternoon I had all four kids at Kohl's. The woman in front of me in the checkout lane was applying for a credit card and it was taking forever. Her husband was getting impatient and decided to chat it up with my kids while we waited. He looked and sounded just like the Indian dude on the Simpson's... (would that be Apu?) Anyway, he asked the boys their names and ages, and held out his finger for Simon to grab. Zack was being his busy self, grabbing a stuffed animal from the shelf and trying to make the baby laugh, but it was very mild behavior for the wild child that he usually is. The man watched him for a second and then said, "You have very good boys... all except for THAT one. THAT one is going to give you hard time." I asked him if he was a prophet. He knelt down and put his finger in Zack's face while saying, "Now you better behave yourself, young man. You have too much energy for your own good." I found it very interesting because he only saw an ounce of Zack's energy. After his wife had signed her life away at Kohl's and they were leaving, he reassured me that there must be some good deep inside that little 4 year old body. And I believe him. There must be
some good under there..... Under where? exactly.
Lucky in Love
counting my blessings
perfectly responsible
sweet and charming
a complete spaz
absolutely adorable
